Encourage Yourself in the Lord (pt.1)

What do you do when you don’t know what to do? When you’re blown away by some tragic situation? Or devastated by crushing circumstances? In 1 Samuel 30, King David, through the sovereignty of God, encountered similar conditions. Having been in Apek, David and his men returned to Ziglag and found the entire city destroyed by fire. The city of Ziglag was left virtually unprotected while David and all the men of Israel were approximately sixty miles away in Apek.[1]The Amalekites had besieged the city while taking all the women and children captive during the invasion. Totally overwhelmed by this dilemma, what did David do? How did he cope with this disaster? We learn a great deal about the character of David and how he dealt with adversity.

Notice the Crime Scene

1. The Crime scene involved the Amalekites (v. 1).
Under line the phrase “Amalekites had invaded.” The Hebrew word “invade”{paw-shat'} means to raid and strip. Who were the Amalekites? They were a roving band of marauders. A gang of corrupt, idolatrous, guerilla terrorists who made their living by looting other nations. Verse 26c tells us they were "the enemy of the Lord."If you remember correctly the Amalekites were the first to ambush Israel when they entered the Promised Land (Exodus 17:8-16).

2. The crime scene involved arson.
(v. 1c). “burned it with fire” v.3a “So David and his men came to the city, and, behold, it was burned with fire;" With protruding, swollen eyes David and his comrades entered the hazy, smoldering city of Ziglag completely puzzled by the murky scene. What on earth happened? The lush, beautiful fields of grass were as black as ash. The dazzling multicolored flowers that once filled the landscape were charred, black, and lifeless. Picturesque farmhouses along the countryside were simmering with embers. The stores, the livery stables, and the synagogues were completely gutted by the blaze. The massive buildings were reduced to skeleton frames. Shocked, stunned, and surprised, the men surveyed the ruined city.

3. The Crime scene involved Abduction (vv. 2-3; 5).
Circle the words “taken captive”- is found 3 times. The women and children became prisoners. Two things would happen to the women and children:

a. They women would be raped repeatedly.
b. Both women and children would be sold into slavery.

4. Finally, the Crime scene involved Anguish (vv. 4-6a).
They began to frantically search for their women and children, but to no avail. Anguish and sorrow gripped their hearts as they began to weep with great travail. Completely devastated by the kidnapping of their families David and his men cried until they could cry no more.

a.Verse 6 described the distress (v. 6a). “greatly distressed”- the Hebrew word {yawtsar'} means to be in a bind or a strait.

b.Verse 6 also described the death threats.These detractors called for a full scale mutiny! They discussed assassination! They were ready to execute David!

c.Verse 6 also described the despair (v. 6b). “grieved”-{maw-rar'} it is translated bitterness the majority of the time. Bitter Christians are capable of doing some awful things.
Things were bad! David was in a leadership crisis.How would he respond?How do good leaders respond to adversity? Leadership guru, John Maxwell shares this observation. Maxwell says,

"How a leader deals with the circumstances of life tells you many things about his character. Crisis doesn’t necessarily make character, but it certainly does reveal it. Adversity is a crossroads that makes a person choose one of two paths: character or compromise. Every time he chooses character, he becomes stronger even if that choice brings negative consequences."[2]

In his book on leadership, John MacArthur said,

“True leadership is tested and proved in crisis. The real leader is the one who can handle the stress. He is the one who can solve the problems, bear the burdens, find the solutions, and win the victories when everyone else is merely flustered, confounded, and perplexed.”[3]

WHAT DID DAVID DO WHEN HE DID NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO?

I. HE WENT TO GOD (v. 6c). The very first person David spoke to was God (not his advisors, but God). Folks you can’t do it on your own!

1. Notice the Source of His strength. v.6 “David encouraged himself in the Lord His God” meaning David strengthen himself or made himself strong. Before he engaged in rescue and recovery he took the time to get spiritually fit!

How do think you would have responded to this tragedy?

a.Perhaps we would beat ourselves with guilt. “I should have done this or I should have that.” Its okay to reflect, but don’t get stuck on “WHAT IF.” In fact, David should not have taken all of the men with him. He virtually left the city of Ziglag defenseless. Hindsight is 20/20.

So many people focus on the past it destroys their future. You will never learn to encourage yourself in the Lord if you sit in the ashes of the past!

b.Perhaps we would have blamed Saul. God commanded Saul to exterminate the Amalekites (15:2-3). Saul disobey God and captured Agag and paraded him throughout the city (v. 8). Saul continued his narcissistic behavior and erected a Sadam Hussein type of
monument to honor himself (v. 12). Blaming Saul would be a good political tactic.

c.Some of us would get stuck on the “why factor.” David could have sat in the ashes completely defeated asking, “Why did this happen to me?”

d.Suppose you were one of David’s men, how do you think you would of responded to the situation? Probably like the other men, STONE HIM! The church of Jesus Christ is full of “Christian Assassins!” Every church seems to have their share of “congregational wardens” who monitor the church fellowship. Armed with THE WEAPON of mass destruction they enjoy sharing “the dirt” on various church members. These unsympathetic believers wish to enforce capital punishment on all those who mess up. Far too many believers are way too eager to place the hood over the offenders head and pull the executioners lever.

e. In rescue and recovery time is crucial. Time was of essence. Would you and I take the time to become strong in the Lord before we began our rescue and recovery efforts?The people were frantic and frightened! Their families had been kidnapped. Yet David took time and went to the Lord with his problem.

What do you do when you don't know what to do? Go to the Lord! David did and recovered all!


[1]Robert P. Gordon, I&II Samuel, Library of Biblical Interpretation, (Grand Rapids: Zondervan Publishing House, 1986), 199.

[2]John C. Maxwell, The 21 Indispensable Qualities of a Leader, (Nashville: Thomas Nelson Publishers, 1999), 3-4.

[3]John MacArthur, The Book on Leadership, (Nashville: Thomas Nelson Publishers, 2004), 45.

LET IT GO (part 3)


A TENDER HEART

Look at Paul’s admonition to the Ephesian church. “Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you” (Ephesians 4:31-32).

1. Why are some believers so unforgiving and so hardhearted? This answer is SIN! Sin will cool off the believer’s fire and passion for Jesus Christ. Are you on fire for God? If not, you have permitted sin to cool off your relationship with Him.

2. Instead of burning with zeal and fervor for Christ we have become frigid and cold. We appear to be God’s chosen frozen! Some attend the first church of the deep freeze Pastored by Jack Frost. Our churches are so cold you can skate up and down the isles. The typical church member appears to be chiseled ice that’s frozen in the pew. The spiritual temperature of the average congregation is so chilly that it has become a religious igloo. What has happened? Sin happened! Sin will paralyze and polarize the heart of the believer. Notice the course of action prescribed by Paul in verse 31.

I. First of all, we must put off gross vices (v. 31). Notice the first two words of our text, “Let all.” We are commanded to forsake “all” the sins of animosity, hostility, rage, slander, and malice. Skevington Wood expands the translation of “let all” to: “Get rid of (artheto) is ‘let it be removed’ and therefore ‘have no more to do with it.’ Every kind of or any trace (pasa, ‘all’) of these blemishes are to be forsaken.”[1] The word “all” indicates that not even a hint of these sins will be tolerated. Each one of these vulgar vices must be eliminated and removed from the believer’s life.

Notice the sins that must be extracted from the believer’s life.

1. He begins with the sin of bitterness. The Greek word pikria {bitterness} refers to resentment that leads to revenge. This individual holds a grudge and a personal vendetta. He lives in a continual state of animosity and hostility. Vengeance and retaliation consumes his heart. Paul told the Ephesian church that there is no place for bitterness in the life of a spirit-filled believer.

2. Next, Paul dealt with the sin of wrath. This thumos {wrath} is an inflaming, boiling, and heated rage. A sudden outburst of uncontrolled frustration.

3. Then he referred to anger. This orge {anger} is wrath that is revealed when a person becomes agitated or roused.

4. The word krauge {clamour} means shouting or an outcry. Clamour is often associated with public outburst that results into chaos and confusion.

5. Then he explained that the believer must remove blasphemia {evil speaking} or slander from his life. Slander is typically exhibited by those who have a bitter spirit. Thus, they frequently engage in smearing campaigns that often involves character assassination.

6. Finally, Paul included the sin of kakia {malice} which is ill-will or a desire to injure. Malice is taking pleasure in the failures of our enemies. For this reason, Paul fervently urged the believer to “put away” all of these gross sins of the flesh. Upon examining verse 31, we must conclude that the heinous features of the old nature are repulsive and nauseous to the Spirit-filled, child of God. It is horrendous for the believer to act like an unbeliever! For the Christian to revert back to the sins of the flesh is like a dog returning to his vomit (2 Peter 2:22). May God help us rid our lives of “all” the sins of the flesh. After we put off our gross vices we must put on godly virtues.

II. Secondly, we must put on godly virtues (v. 32).

1. Paul began his description of these godly virtues by using the expression ginomai {be ye} or to become. A. T. Robertson said, “Be ye kind to one another (ginesthe eis allelous chrestio) is the present middle imperative of ginomai, keep on becoming kind (chrestos, used of God in Rom. 2:4) toward one another. See Col. 3:12f.”[2] In other words, Paul gave the believers at Ephesus room to grow in their personal walk. To become what God wants me to be simply means I must reach my full potential for Christ. Paul urged the Ephesian believers to become spiritually mature in their Christian life. He began with the quality of chrestos {kindness} or goodness. In dealing with others, the believer must not be harsh, unkind, or malicious. But on the contrary, the child of God must be pleasant, gracious, and benevolent. There is no room for mean-spirited Christianity in the body of Christ. Therefore, Paul commanded the believer to become a person of genuine kindness and generosity.

2. Paul continued with the godly quality of eusplagchnos {tenderheartedness} or compassion. This unusual Greek word is found only one other time in the New Testament and is translated “pity” in 1 Peter 3:8. With reference to this word, Wood says, “Compassionate (eusplangchnoi) is a rare word. It was used by Hippocrates to describe the healthy function of the intestines. The Greeks located the seat of the emotions in the splangchna or internal organs – liver, kidneys, and larger viscera.”[3] Tenderheartedness is the inward emotion of compassion that flows from the heart of the believer. The child of God must possess a sincere sympathy for his brothers and sisters in Christ. On the other hand, a hard heart produces anger, bitterness, and revenge. Stouthearted individuals are unsympathetic, uncaring, and unkind. The coldhearted Christian can be ruthless and calloused. This type of testimony is detrimental to the cause of Christ. May God give us a tender heart.

3. Subsequently, Paul shared some thoughts on charizomai {forgiveness}. This Greek expression means to graciously pardon or to restore. The compassionate, Christ-like believer has a tender heart that’s quick to forgive. Paul reminded us that the sacrificial death of Christ liberates the believer from condemnation. In the same way our loving Lord is eager to forgive, we must be willing to pardon those who offend us.It is ludicrous for Christian’s to holdgrudges against each other when Christ has freely forgiven all men.

What do you do when you don’t know what to do? Be quick to forgive! Let it go! Move on! Life is full of disagreements, yet we can learn to disagree disagreeably. We can be kind and considerate. While we may not agree with everyone in every situation we can still love and respect each other. Different ideas and opinions make life interesting. Nonetheless, longsuffering, kindness, tenderheartedness, compassion, and forgiveness can help us as we work through the various issues of life. A gracious spirit and a gentle heart can go a long way in resolving conflict. Qualities like forbearance, love, sensitivity, and a sweet spirit can overcome revenge, grudges, and animosity. We must refuse to embrace ill-feelings toward a fellow brother in Christ. It is absolutely wrong for the believer to be held hostage to satanic emotions like revenge, hate, and hostility. Therefore, the child of God must be swift to forgive and pardon those who offend him.



[1]Skevington Wood, Ephesians, The Expositor’s Bible Commentary, (Grand Rapids: Zondervan Publishing House, 1978), 65.

[2]A. T. Robertson, Word Pictures in the New Testament, (Nashville: Broadman Press, 1931), IV:541.

[3]Skevington Wood, Ephesians, The Expositor’s Bible Commentary, 66.

DEAL WITH YOUR ANGER

1. Wrath or anger is often the root cause of an unforgiving spirit. Anger is a normal human emotion that is caused by hurt or pain. Everyone gets peeved! Upset! Or mad. This is a normal human experience. Nevertheless, we must deal with our anger in a spiritual, Christ-like manner.

2.What happens when a believer holds on to anger? Unhealthy anger can create detrimental attitudes, like resentment, bitterness, hostility, strife and envy. Pretty soon these cancerous emotions eat away at your spiritual life. Therefore, it is of the utmost importance that we learn how to harness our anger.

3. The Wisdom literature of Solomon provides insight concerning rage. Solomon explained that we must be slow to anger. A person who is 'arek {slow} to anger or is longsuffering can calm the inner issue of strife (Proverbs 15:18).

4. In the same way anger provokes strife, patience fosters peace and tranquility. When the spiritual balm of longsuffering is applied to our anger, a soothing of the soul is produced in the heart of the believer. Cooler heads prevail when longsuffering is exercised. The spiritual fruit of longsuffering will reduce anger in your life.

5. Solomon illustrated this truth in the book of Proverbs. He explained to us that those who are slow to anger are compared to those who capture an entire city. When a believer has mashal {dominion} over his own spirit he is of more value than those who are physically strong (Proverbs 16:32).

6. We do not reveal our inner strength through anger, but by self-control. This is completely contrary to the philosophy of the world. Secular ideology suggests that you gain control through fear and intimidation. Many individuals use anger manipulation to get what they want. The technique of fear is employed when one says, “I will make you pay if you don’t give me what I want.” Instead of being miserable we surrender to their personal demands.

7. Even children learn to use anger to their advantage at a very young age. For instance, they throw a temper tantrum and we give them what they want in order to quiet them down. When we reward this type of behavior we are encouraging the perverted act of anger manipulation. Every successful act of surrender is registered in their minds. Consequently, they consistently repeat this behavior to gain what they want. Their thought process is being formed or better yet, deformed. The die is being cast. They think, “It worked once, I’ll do it again. This must be how you get what you want.”

8. Nevertheless, the wise parent does not reward rage and wrath. Unbridled anger will consign your child to a life of pain and misery. For instance, Solomon said, “A man of great wrath shall suffer punishment: for if thou deliver him, yet thou must do it again (Proverbs 19:19). In other words, repeated failures will occur. You can save your child from a life of heartache by dealing with their anger at very young age.

9. As a parent, there are a few things you can do to nurture your child’s temperament. The very first lesson we must learn is to reward self-control. Do not reward temper tantrums!

10. Anger manipulation often begins at a very young age. Let me illustrate, it is around 9:00 p.m. in the evening and it is time for you to put your baby to bed. You prepare the bottle for that last feeding. You change his diaper and gently put your infant to sleep. However, your baby does not want to go to sleep. He begins to scream like a Comanche Indian about to go on the war-path. The natural response for the parent is to pick the baby up. All of a sudden the baby stops crying. You lay the baby back down and he begins to scream all over again. You pick the baby up, he stops crying. Please understand, I a not referring to a sick or hungry baby. Use a little common sense here. The truth of the matter is your baby just wants to be held. So you spend the next two hours rocking the baby to sleep. Momma, you didn’t realize it then, but you just agreed to rock your baby to sleep each night for two hours for the next ten years!

11. Have you ever met the parent who took their child for a ride each night to get them to stop crying so that they would go to sleep? In reality the child took you for a ride!What ever happen to putting your child to bed at nine o’clock each night crying or no crying? After a couple a nights, your child will learn it is bedtime. Go ahead and lay them down. If they cry and they are not sick or running a fever, let them cry!

12. A couple of years go by. Your child is now two years old. You are grocery shopping at Kroger. Shopping with a two year can be eventful to say the least. As you begin to go
through the check-out line your child begins to see all the candy. As you begin to empty the shopping cart you look out of the corner of your eye and see that your child is reaching for a candy bar. You say, “No, no, no, no!” Your child says, “Yes, yes, yes, yes!” Your child becomes angry and begins to cry like a Comanche Indian about to go on the war-path. You do your best to quite your child. You put your right index finger to your mouth and say,“Shhhhhhhhhhhh.” But he continues to scream at the top of his lungs. He wants that candy bar! Needless to say, you are embarrassed by the fit your child is throwing. To shut the child up you surrender and buy the candy bar. Your child just successfully used anger to manipulate you to get what he wanted. You rewarded bad behavior. By the way, it only gets worse as your child gets older. Anger, bitterness and an unforgiving spirit will become their way life.

13. If you deal with your child’s anger in the early stages they will learn to become forgiving individuals. Anger and unforgiveness are linked together in the scriptures. You can mark it down, those who are unforgiving and hold grudges as adults had an anger problem in their youth.

14. Please take note! Unforgiving people have anger issues. Anger is the root cause behind an unforgiving spirit. A wise man learns to defuse his anger. This is what Solomon meant when he said, “The discretion of a man deferreth his anger; and it is his glory to pass over a transgression” (Proverbs 19:11).This is an awesome text that deals with anger and forgiveness! Notice who Solomon is describing. He is portraying a man of “discretion.” The Hebrew word sekel {discretion} means wisdom, insight, and understanding. This wise man possesses two outstanding qualities according to this verse.

a. First of all, the wise man has a long fuse. The word 'arak {deferreth} means to continue long. It is also translated “to draw out” or “to lengthen.” In other words, the wise man has a long fuse. The cord that ignites the passion of his anger is lengthy and drawn out. He defers his anger. He is not easily set off! On the other hand, have you ever met the man who has “a short fuse?” It really doesn’t take much to set him in orbit. Solomon calls him a fool (Ecclesiastes 7:9). The only difference between the wise man and the fool is how he deals with his anger. The wise man has a long fuse.

b. Secondly, the wise man does not embrace the faults of others. Notice the second part of the text (Proverbs 19:11). He has the spiritual insight to `abar {pass over or pass through} the transgressions of others. In other words, he doesn’t hold on to the faults of others. When he is confronted with the flaws of men, he lets it pass through. He doesn’t keep a list of faults. The wise man doesn’t constantly grasp at the blemishes of others. He doesn’t record the imperfections of men. Solomon explained that it is the glory of the wise man to let go of the transgressions of others. The prudent individual has a long fuse and doesn’t keep a list of the failures of others. He is not a fault finder!

What do you do when you don’t know what to do? Let it go! Don’t hold on to flaws of your friends. Anger, bitterness and resentment will only hurt you in the long run.

WHAT TO DO
When you don’t know what to do?

LET IT GO

What do you do when you don’t know what to do? Learn to forgive. Let it go! Move on, by all means. Don’t hold a grudge. Don’t be held hostage by ill feelings toward someone else.

1. Keeping a tally sheet of all mistreatments will only hurt you in the long run. Those who embrace “the get even” philosophy are very unhappy people. Let God move you through the process of hurt to healing. As you progress through your emotional wounds learn to let go of animosity, bitterness and hostility.

2. Harboring feelings of resentment will destroy your spiritual life. Furthermore, your root of bitterness could spill over onto others and spoil the spiritual growth of those around you (Hebrews 12:15).

3. It is wrong for you and me to make a proverbial hit list of those who have hurt us?

Maybe you can identity with the story Chuck Swindoll shared in his one of his sermons. Swindoll said,

It’s like the fellow who was bitten by a dog and was later told by his physician, “Yes, indeed, you do have rabies.” Upon hearing this, the patient immediately pulled out a pad and pencil and began to write.Thinking the man was making out his will, the doctor said, “Listen, this doesn’t mean you’re going to die. There’s a cure for rabies.” “I know that,” said the man. “I’m making a list of people I’m gonna bite.”[1]

Perhaps you are making a list of people you are going to bite. You are going to get even no matter what. Have we forgotten that vengeance belongs to God alone? How can the believer learn to forgive? First of all, we must not be vengeful.

DON’T BE VENGEFUL

Paul shared some transforming truths regarding revenge. In his letter to the Romans, he
said, “Recompense to no man evil for evil. Provide things honest in the sight of all men. 18 If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men. Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord. 20 Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head. 21 Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good” (Romans 12:17-21).

The child of God must be a peacemaker and not a troublemaker (Matthew 5:9). The believer must refuse to be the instigator of conflict.

Notice the content of Paul’s charge.

1. First of all, the believer must never entertain thoughts of pay back (v. 17a). The Greek word apodidomi {recompense} literally means to pay back. In other words, if you do me wrong, I am going to do you wrong. This is pay back!

"There were some fellows in the military who were stationed in Korea during the Korean War. While there, they hired a local boy to cook and clean for them. Being a bunch of jokesters, these guys soon took advantage of the boy’s seeming naiveté. They’d smear Vaseline on the stove handles so that when he’d turn the stove on in the morning he’d get grease all over his fingers. They’d put little water buckets over the door so that he’d get deluged when he opened the door. They’d even nail his shoes to the floor during the night. Day after day the little fella took the brunt of their practical jokes without saying anything. No blame…no self-pity…no temper tantrums.Finally the men felt guilty about what they were doing, so they sat down with the young Korean and said, “Look, we know these pranks aren’t funny anymore, and we’re sorry. We’re never gonna take advantage of you again.” It seemed too good to be true to the houseboy. “No more sticky on stove?” he asked. “Nope.” “No more water on door?” “No.” “No more nail shoes to floor?” “Nope, never again.” “Okay,” the boy said with a smile… “no more spit in soup.”[2]

Even though we might not spit in someone’s soup, we all have been involved in pay backs at one time or the other. Paul commanded the believer to refrain from pay backs.

2. Secondly, Paul commanded the believer to be honorable (v. 17b). In other words, do what is right in the sight of all men. Act honorably while others act dishonorably. Do the right thing even though others are doing the wrong thing. When people mistreat you, you can react in two ways. You can take the high road and respond like Jesus, or you can plan a process of pay back. However, we must remember, if we choose the second option we become like those who are doing evil. Do you really want to be like those who do such wickedness? Let me illustrate. Suppose someone rips you off financially. In the midst of your pain and suffering you begin to strategically plan a means of pay back. You initiate the pay back successfully and hurt the person who hurt you. In reality the outcome was not successful! Why? Because you have became like the person who hurt you. You did evil just like they did evil. As a matter of fact you didn’t take the high road. You took the low road of pay back. Paul issued a command for the believer to act honorably.

3. Thirdly, the believer must be an ambassador of peace (v. 18). Paul told Timothy that the servant of the Lord must not be a person of strife. He must be gentle, patient and meek (2 Timothy 2:24). Carnal, combatant Christians are ineffective in ministry. However, the spirit-filled saint will go to extremes to keep peace and unity in the body of Christ (Ephesians 4:3).

Are you the kind of person that gets easily upset? Is fellowshipping with you kind of like walking through a field of land mines? You never know what might set you off. Are you the kind of person that must be handled with “kid cloves?” Do you thrive on trouble, turbulence and turmoil? Are you the proverbial “drama queen or king?” Everything seems to be a major issue with you. Do you feed off frenzy? Do you cause people to walk on “egg shells” in your presence? Are you so sensitive that if someone looks at you the wrong way you get your feelings hurt? Certainly no one desires to have this kind of testimony or reputation. Yet our churches are full of individuals who are easily offended. Paul instructed the believer to do
everything humanly possible to live in peace with each other.

4. Fourthly, let God handle the retribution (v. 19). Don’t be a vengeful person. Many scholars translate the phrase, “but rather give place unto wrath,” as “leave room for the wrath of God.”[3] Everett F. Harrison agrees with this more literal translation.[4] Quoting from Deuteronomy 32:35, Paul reminded the believer that vengeance belongs to God alone. In His divine plan, God can handle our enemies in His time without our intrusion or assistance.

Someone might ask, “How should I handle my enemies?” Anticipating this question, Paul shared some rather unusual advice. He told the persecuted believers at Rome to nikao {overcome} or conquer evil by doing good. If your enemy is hungry, feed him. If he is thirsty, give him something to drink. Such godly behavior would soreuo {heap} or overwhelm your enemy with shame. The insight Paul was trying to teach was that loving your enemy by meeting his needs would convict him of his hostility. Concerning this unusual phrase, John Witmer says, “The coals on the head may refer to a ritual in Egypt in which a person showed his repentance by carrying a pan of burning charcoal on his head. Helping rather than cursing an enemy may cause him to be ashamed and penitent.”[5] Conquer evil by doing good! The life of Corrie Ten Boom illustrates this principle.

"It wasn’t easy for Corrie Ten Boom to forgive the Nazi captors who had tormented her at Ravensbruck. They had caused her to suffer horribly. Even worse, they had caused the death of her sister, Betsy. Ten years after her release, Corrie ran into a lady who wouldn’t look her in the eyes. Asking about her, Corrie was told the woman had been a nurse at a concentration camp. Suddenly the memories flashed back. Corrie recalled taking Betsy to the infirmary to see this woman. Betsy’s feet were paralyzed, and she was dying. The nurse had been cruel and sharp-tongued.Corrie’s hatred now returned with vengeance. Her rage so boiled that she knew of but one thing to do. “Forgive me,” she cried out to the Lord, “Forgive my hatred, O Lord. Teach me to love my enemies.” The blood of Jesus Christ seemed to suddenly cool her embittered heart, and Corrie felt the rage being displaced with a divine love she couldn’t explain. She began praying for the woman, and one day shortly afterward she called the hospital where the nurse worked and invited the woman to a meeting at which she was speaking.“What!” replied the nurse. “Do you want me to come?”“Yes, that is why I called you.”
“Then I’ll come.” That evening the nurse listened carefully to Corrie’s talk, and afterward Corrie sat down with her, opened her Bible, and explained 1 John 4:9: “In this the love of God
was manifested toward us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through Him.” The woman seemed to thirst for Corrie’s quiet, confident words about God’s love for us, his enemies. And that night, a former captive led her former captor to “a decision that made the angels sing.” God had taken Corrie’s subconscious feelings of hatred, she later explained, and transformed them, using them as a window through which His light could shine into a darkened heart.[6]

Corrie Ten Boom conquered the evil of this nurse by loving her to Jesus Christ. Don’t be vengeful! Let God deal with your enemies. By all means, let it go!


[1] Charles Swindoll, Hope Again, (Dallas, London, Vancouver, Melbourne: Word Publishing, 1996), 83.
[2] Ibid, 83-84.
[3] John MacArthur, Jr., The MacArthur New Testament Commentary, Romans 9-16, (Chicago: Moody Press, 1994), 2:202.
[4] Everett F. Harrison, The Expositor’s Bible Commentary, Romans, (Grand Rapids: Zondervan Publishing House, 1976), 135.
[5] John A. Witmer, The Bible Knowledge Commentary, Romans, (Colorado Springs: ChariotVictor Publishing, 1983), 490.
[6] Robert J Morgan, Nelson’s Complete Book of Stories, Illustrations, & Quotes, (Nashville: Thomas Nelson Publishers, 2000), 266.

HOW CAN I STOP PLAYING THIS GAME?

I. First of all, we must get honest.

a. Why do believers lie about their spiritual life? Could it be we are so bent with impressing others?

John said, “If we say that we have fellowship with him, and walk in darkness, we lie, and do not the truth (1 John 1:6). Notice the first three words of the text, “If we say.” John repeats this phrase six times in the first two chapters of his letter (1:6, 8, 10; 2:4, 6, 9). He gave us a contrast between saying and doing.

Ø The Christian life is not mere talk, but a walk with Jesus Christ.
Ø In other words, our walk should match out talk.
Ø Our lives should equal our lips.

Most believers talk a good game, yet we have difficulty living the way God expects us to live. Our text explains the believers “walk” reveals his koinonia {fellowship} with God. Not his talk! We must walk in the light as He is in the light if we are to have fellowship with God (v. 7). So what’s the problem? The dilemma is “the lie” in verse 6. If the believer says he is right with God, yet he walks “in darkness,” he is lying about his intimacy with God. In reality, he is playing games with God. We masquerade as spirit-filled believers deceiving even the best of Christians. Yet, God can see through the facade. While it may be easy to fool our Christian friends about our spiritual life, you cannot dupe God! He will not be conned.

b. After lying so long to others about our spiritual life, we too, begin to believe the lie. In essence, we deceive ourselves.

John said, “If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us” (1 John 1:8). Self-deception in this case is a willfulness of being blind to our sin. Therefore, John says, because of this self-deception “the truth is not in us.”

c. The key to overcoming deceit is getting the truth “in us.” Thus, we must discover the biblical definition of “the truth.” What is “the truth?” Jesus gave us wonderful insight to defining “the truth” in His high priestly prayer. He prayed, “Sanctify them through thy truth: thy word is truth” (1 John 17:17). Jesus provided the most precise definition for truth in His prayer “thy word is truth.”

d. God has made available to every believer the sanctifying tool of His Word to cleanse our heart. This is why it is so important for believers to get into the Word. When believers get into the Word, the Word will get into believers. Consequently, believers will be sanctified or cleansed by the truth of God’s Word. When the child of God gets serious about the Word of God he usually stops playing religious games.

Let’s review.John explained to us that we begin playing religious games when we lie to others about our fellowship with Christ.

We become so good at lying about our spiritual condition that we actually believe the lie. In other words, we deceive ourselves. Self-deception leads to lying to God. How ridiculous! To even think we can pull the wool over God’s omniscient eyes. Nevertheless, John said, “If we say that we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us”(1 John 1:10). What are the results of lying to God? John said, “his word is not in us.” Then what is in us? Deception! Lies! Untruth! Deceit! Ask yourself one question. Be totally honest. “Am I in the Word of God?” If you are not in the Word of God, then the Word of God is not in you! Well, then, what is in me? Deception, lies, untruth and deceit. How can I purge my heart of such wickedness? The Word of God! We must get honest! Our Bibles are collecting dust! We occasionally use it as our ticket into church, but that’s about it. It has become our religious rabbit’s foot. Christian, get back into your Bibles and God will become real in your life (John 15:7).

II. Secondly, focus on the solutions, not the problem. We must view life with a biblical perspective.

Job said, “Man that is born of a woman is of few days, and full of trouble” (Job 14:1). We cannot ignore the challenges of life. Nevertheless, we too must see the scriptural solutions.

a. If all you see is the problem, you will become frustrated and depressed. God wants you to focus on solutions! Fix the problem! Jesus is the problem solver! Let me illustrate. Man’s greatest problem is a sin problem. Yet, God the Father solved this dilemma by the sacrifice of His son (Romans 3:23-25; 6:23). Furthermore, He has furnished you and I with everything we need through the death of Christ (Romans 8:32).

b. Are you a moaner and groaner?Or maybe you are a mumbler and grumbler.Some are gripers in diapers. Yet, others are whiners and piners. But worst of all, there are grouches on couches. Take some biblical advice from the Psalmist of Israel, who said,

“I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the LORD, which made heaven and earth. He will not suffer thy foot to be moved: he that keepeth thee will not slumber. Behold, he that keeps Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep. The LORD is thy keeper: the LORD is thy shade upon thy right hand. The sun shall not smite thee by day, nor the moon by night. The LORD shall preserve thee from all evil: he shall preserve thy soul. The LORD shall preserve thy going out and thy coming in from this time forth, and even for evermore. (Psalm 121:1-8).

c. If all you do is focus on the cause of your problems and ignore the solutions, the blame
game will continue. We have become experts at pointing fingers. Shifting the blame seems to be our favorite pastime. However, if you are really looking for a sure cure for that deadly game, try focusing on biblical solutions and opportunities. You might be surprised by what God can do.

III. Thirdly, decide to become a victor not a victim.

a. People who become experts at playing the blame game are usually those who have the
attitude they have been victimized. Before long they embrace the “martyrs complex.” They lose their spiritual joy, peace and vitality. They sit in the proverbial seat of the scornful. Defeated and dejected they have forgotten the inspired words of the Apostle Paul, “Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us. For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers,nor things present, nor things to come, Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature,shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 8:37-39) . How can this be? More than conquerors? Usually we do not highlight the words “through him.” Yet, those two words are very crucial since the victory is ours through the person of Jesus Christ.

b. Have you ever heard this statement? “I guess I’m just a victim of my circumstances.” While this may be true, Jesus wants us to be victors over our circumstances. As a child of God, you are not just a “conqueror,” but “we are more than conquerors through him that loved us.” Start living what you are! More than conquerors! This frame of mind will eliminate the blame game before it even begins.

What do you do when you don’t know what to do? By all means don’t play the blame game. Those who sit around blaming everyone else for all of their problems never get better. They are content with spinning their wheels and never going any where. They never progress in their Christian walk. In the midst of their hardships they blame God for doing something “to them.” In reality, He wants to do something in them and through them. But, they continue to point the accusing finger at those around them, even impugning God. They have been subtly lured into this demonic behavior failing to realize that there are no winners in this game. Only losers play the blame game.

Discussion

1. When was the last time you played the blame game?
2. Why is it so easy to blame others?
3. How can the Word of God help me conqueror the blame game?